Political Roundup -- August 2012 (The unCONVENTIONal edition)

And now, the news in brief. For the proper effect and gravitas, please play this in the background while reading.

Missouri Representative and Senate candidate Todd Akin drew fire for claiming that pregnancy rarely occurs in situations of "legitimate rape," which he later clarified meant "forcible" rape. Despite the calls of opponents and GOP leaders to drop out of the race, Akins has persisted and recently told supporters, "We're going to carry on this campaign! We're going to fight! We're going to earn a legitimate victory over liberalism! We're going to... what? What??"

Akins' remarks had broader repercussions as the Romney campaign is likely to recall its "Ryan/Romney: Legitimate Conservatism" bumper stickers. Meanwhile, Joe Biden told a campaign rally, "We are not going anywhere! We are going to defeat the Republicans through the most legitimate and forcible campaigning ever seen! Four more years! Four more... what? What??"

History's Mysteries: Abraham Lincoln and the Undead

Warning: Spoilers! (...in case you care that much about movies featuring Abe Lincoln fighting monsters)

About a week or so ago, my fiancee and I went to see Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. The movie, if you're not aware, is about Abraham Lincoln being a guy who hunts vampires. Hence, you know, the title. For those of you who have not seen it, I don't want to spend too much time on it, so I'll post the trailer and a few bullet points summarizing my experience.

Chick-fil-A: Where Money and Strict Conservativism Meet Substandard Chicken Sandwiches

Before I get into the tender breast meat of this blog post, let me summarize my feelings about Chick-fil-A circa one month ago:

- Why would someone build a restaurant dedicated to substandard chicken sandwiches?

- Why would they advertise them so...strangely?

If the cows are sentient, how do we know the chickens aren't also?